Congratulations to 3L Shelly Harris and her husband Eliot on the birth of their daughter Madeleine Lee!
Thumbs up to the return of the Law School band. Jon Lucier, those khaki shorts and loafers just can’t conceal your hipster alter-ego anymore.
Thumbs up to the first full day of rain in months. ANG’s been making it rain since the day ANG was born, but apparently throwing money at strippers does not help grow plants.
Thumbs up to the 1L Softball Tournament. ANG’s excited for eight straight hours of watching softball. ANG hasn’t done anything for eight straight hours since ANG’s brother dared ANG to eat pudding for eight straight hours back in ’97. ANG hopes this eight hours is more enjoyable.
Thumbs down to the pitch-dark bus ride to the 3L Bonfire. ANG spent years hoping for such a quality make-out opportunity. Unfortunately, those years were 1996 through 1999.
Thumbs down to ANG for failing to fact-check ANG’s thumbs down last week to the 1L softball team who allegedly manipulated the rules. ANG seems to have forgotten the lesson ANG learned in ’Nam: the only source ANG can trust is ANG’s own eyes.
Thumbs down to the short course professor who changed the course requirement from a 10-page paper to a 15–20-page paper after the deadline to drop the class. “Bait-and-switch” doesn’t properly describe this. It’s more like a “Bait-and-kick-ANG-in-the-face.”
Thumbs down to Dewey & LeBoeuf for taking interviewees out for drinks at Ten and then somehow failing to pay. ANG would like to see that “generous bonus structure” in writing, please.
M. Dooley: “Canned spinach is the single greatest disappointment of my life.”
G. Rutherglen: “I have this weird feeling I’m back in the ’90s. Clarence Thomas attacking Anita Hill, OJ Simpson in court, Hillary Clinton is proposing healthcare . . . maybe I’m fifteen years younger than I thought.”
J. O’Connell: “‘Delict’ is a word in the English language we use . . . sometimes . . . if you’re fancy . . . which I am.”
R. Harmon: “So today’s take home point . . . shove the drugs down your pants.”
M. Collins: [pointing to a blackboard full of diagrams] “This . . . is habeas corpus.” [pointing to his tie] “And this . . . is the only tie they had in the bookstore.”
K. Abraham: “It’s called subrogation and we’ll talk about it next week.”
Student: “Cool.”
K. Abraham: “Well, I’ve never heard it described that way.”
W. Broome [from Darden]: “I apologize for my profession [as an accountant], it’s got some quirks in it . . . you all probably never apologize for your profession, but you should.”
D. Leslie: “I don't think I can draw this. Of course I can draw this—I can do anything!”
